Oprah’s interview with Harry and Meghan is on a par with the 1995 BBC interview with Lady Diana. It asked for compassion, and got it. And, like Diana’s, did it manipulate too? Oh yes.
So much in those two hours, but a couple of things niggled at me. Things that weren’t only in the murky realm of “they said”. Rather things that can held up and examined.
Romance or irresponsibility
Meghan said she did no research into Harry or the Royals before agreeing to marry him. No, she didn’t google her husband-to-be. And she said, as an American, she knew very little about the Royal Family.
However, as Oprah pointed out, when anyone marries, they are marrying the family as well as a person. In the case of a royalty, you’re also marrying a whole nation, a whole commonwealth maybe. I think it’s incumbent on you, in that case, to find out what you’re letting yourself in for. Or simply learn about the people and country you’re going to be a part of. As my husband said, if you were asked to give a speech to the Caterpillar Collectors of Peoria, you’d likely google them and Peoria just so you’d know a little bit before you got there.
If you don’t, at least in marriage, the person you’re marrying should point familial expectations and potential pitfalls to you. Especially, I’d think, when it’s a royal family with a national – and international – press hungry for any and all details about you.
Harry has had a few girlfriends leave him because they didn’t want to be part of the circus that comes with being a royal in Britain. Plus, as he made clear in this interview, he knows how horribly wrong it can go. So wouldn’t he make it crystal-clear to Meghan what she was letting herself in for?
How to curtsy
A funny story Meghan told suggests that he didn’t even make it clear what it would be like being a family member. On the way to Andrew’s house, where the Queen was expected to drop in, he casually asked her if she knew how to curtsy. Five minutes away from arriving, Meghan laughed, no time to even google it. So some practice curtsies outside before she went in to meet the queen of the family, the Queen of the realm.
That gobsmacked me. Harry not realizing that there is absolutely no reason why Meghan would know how to curtsy. Unless she needed to know for a period piece she was acting it, it’s just not something regular people learn. So was he really still that wrapped up in his royal cocoon?
Security
Meghan and Harry said that their security had been pulled when they lived in Canada. Oprah asked who provided the security. The UK, he said. Wait a minute, Harry. You might want to acknowledge Canada did too, through the RCMP. Our government was pretty tight-lipped about the amount because Canadian taxpayers on the whole weren’t very happy about it.
But we had no choice while you were working royals. You were then classified as IPPs – internationally protected persons. All countries agree to pay security costs for visiting IPPs. So while you were here, we paid. When you no longer were working royals, the security obligations ended. That’s how it works. It wasn’t personal.
Archie
The security discussion led Meghan to talk about Archie’s titles, or lack thereof, and again the unidentified “them”. Security being withdrawn from Harry and Meghan meant no security for the baby either. If he were a prince, she implied, he’d be entitled to security. Huh? Is he a working royal? He’s two.
Then she went into a confused and confusing explanation of why Archie doesn’t have a title and won’t in future, she says. The “George V or George VI convention” – her words. There’s probably several libraries in the palaces, and there’s a resident queen who knows a lot about this stuff. But, failing those, there’s Google.
I goggled it: Archie will become a prince, and HRH, when he is a grandchild of the reigning monarch. At present, he is a great-grandchild. It was the Queen’s grandfather, George V, who decided how many generations for what titles in his 1917 Letters Patent.
Queen Elizabeth changed some of those rules in 2012 before the birth of Prince George. She removed the male heir precedence and she deemed all children of direct heirs to the throne to be styled Prince or Princess. That would be the children of William, who is the heir after Charles. Harry and his children are not in that direct line. Charles may do his own Letters Patent and change things again when he is king.
As working royals, the Sussexes – and their children – were entitled to security paid for by the British government. But now, with their change in status, they’re not. Again, it’s not personal.
Commonwealth
Towards the end of the interview, Harry and Meghan said what a great loss for the Commonwealth that their removal from official royaldom was. They were emblematic of it, and as Meghan said “see it, be it.” True, and quite possibly part of the Queen’s thinking when she appointed them President and Vice-President of the Queen’s Commonwealth Trust.
- Here’s what I wrote when Harry and Meghan got married. Feels like a long time ago, but less than three years.
Kim Moore
11 Mar 2021Yes! It was great meeting Guy! I remember seeing him sit next to the Queen in the carriage on the day of the wedding. That little rescued beagle has come a long way. Someone should do a children’s book. I strained to see their other dog in the short video on the beach, but we’re only given glimpses. Maybe with time.
Dorothy
12 Mar 2021A children’s book is a great idea! So there you go – a new project for you. You’re welcome! 😉
Kim Moore
9 Mar 2021Thank you for clarifying some issues that seemed garbled…why Archie wasn’t given a title for instance…and you make a good point. A little preparation before making the big step seemed warranted. But, I guess it’s only human to want something so badly, you turn a blind eye. Been there. Anyway, the skin colour issue still sticks in my craw and I have to say I’m for team Harry and Meghan. I would like to see that man happy.
Dorothy
10 Mar 2021Thanks Kim. As you say, only human – and understandable. But the stakes with royal marriages are high. So due diligence, I think is the term? The racism is very difficult indeed. I’d like to hear the full story on all these things, but we won’t. At least not from those directly involved. Lots of opinions, though! A good article is on The Atlantic, “Meghan and Harry Go To War”. It looks at small and large issues from British and American perspectives, so very insightful. Yes, I’d like to see him happy too. And Meghan as well.
Kim Moore
11 Mar 2021Thanks for the link to The Atlantic article…a good one. It was very measured and didn’t take sides. Unlike most, I think the Queen’s response was a good one. What else should she say after all. And, this is just a personal aside…it’s my take that the remark re Archie’s skin colour was not made by any of the main players. I really don’t think the monarchy is racist. Perhaps, it was Camilla, but I confess to not liking her anyway, so that may colour my opinion here.
Dorothy
11 Mar 2021Hi, I thought you’d like that article. I agree with you about it, and about the Queen’s statement. I’ve come to admire Camilla. She’s taken a lot of abuse, and always kept quiet and gracious. There’s someone else I’ve got my money on for ‘who said it?’ It feels wrong to be doing that, but you can’t not. It’s like when someone posts an upsetting statement on Facebook without explanation. It’s worrying no matter whether you know the person or not. On another part of the interview, wasn’t it great meeting Guy the Beagle! 🙂 Wish we’d met the other dog too.